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Blog Entry 48 of 48 Adventures of a Stay Home Mom
Mom and children's author chronicles the frustrations, joys, embarrassments and struggles of staying home with her three boys and trying to get published.

Blog Url: http://denver.yourhub.com/~mom

Give me that muffin!
Contributed by: Stephanie Blake   on 4/24/2007

Can someone tell me why I am always hungry at 10:00 at night? And why do I crave cheesecake, buffalo wings, chocolate or nachos at that hour? It has to be hormonal. Please tell me it can be fixed! I had to break down and buy a tankini this year! All of a sudden, a tiny roll hangs over the top of my jeans. Don't laugh. I believe it is called a "muffin top." Or maybe it's "junk in the front."

I don't want a muffin top, unless it is cranberry-orange, peanut butter, or chocolate chip, and slathered with butter. I also do not want to do 100 sit-ups every day, unless Brad Pitt wants to meet me next time he's in town. I do not want to run, unless a very large dog is chasing me. I do not want to spin, pilate, yoga, or kick box unless there is a robber coming in my window.

What to do? Switch to low fat? Limit my calorie intake? Stop eating Hostess Snoballs? Shun trans fat? Stop drinking beer? I am pretty sure that Hostess Snoballs are filled with trans fat. They have to be. They are one of the items on my "last meal request" list. And Bud light. Well, there' s a sandwich in every can.

If I ever have to order a last meal, I want a piece of ahi tuna, lightly seared, a heaping mountain of mashed potatoes and gravy on the side, a steaming pile of sweet potato casserole (with marshmellows), a Grande latte from Starbucks, a Bud Light and a package of Hostess Snoballs for dessert. What's on your list?

I've been thin my whole life. Could eat anything...and I mean ANYTHING and stay about 100 pounds (when I wasn't pregnant). My mother told me this would happen. Curses! Why is it that at 4-months-away-from 38, your metabolism suddenly comes to a screeching to a halt? How can it be? And am I finally going to get big boobs out of the deal?


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Showing 1-6 of 6 comments
Submitted By: Kate Jones
posted on 7/24/2008 @ 1:39:26 AM
Rated Blog Entry
Be glad it waited until you were 38 to happen -- my metabolism started slowing down when I was in my early twenties. I combat it with occasional hikes and frequent grumbling (about as effective as you think it is). I call it 'dunlap disease' -- my belly dun lapped over!
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Submitted By: Maureen Edwards
posted on 12/3/2007 @ 3:52:29 PM
Rated Blog Entry
Nice writing--humorous and descriptive.
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Submitted By: Elina Martinez
posted on 9/15/2007 @ 8:19:58 PM
Rated Blog Entry
Your just lucky your not pregnant....it's worse than that. LOL
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Submitted By: Nikki Britain
posted on 5/2/2007 @ 8:32:42 PM
Rated Blog Entry
End of the day...it's Cool Ranch Doritos and a big glass of wine!
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Submitted By: Tabitha Dial
posted on 4/26/2007 @ 2:50:36 PM
Rated Blog Entry
Do you eat within an hour or two of waking up? That is supposed to help you with your metabolism ... My last meal would be ... would be ... would be ... oh man. I can't decide between smothered burritos or curry ...
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Submitted By: Robin Nolet
posted on 4/25/2007 @ 11:02:11 PM
Rated Blog Entry
Welcome to my world, Stephanie! That dang metobolism is the curse of middle age...but I still give in to the occassional late night batch of chocolate chip pancakes!
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Showing 1-6 of 6 comments
CONTRIBUTOR INFORMATION

Stephanie Blake

Parker , CO

Stephanie Blake has posted 48 blog entries and 120 comments since joining on 2/14/2006. Stephanie Blake 's average blog rating is 4.95.
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