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Arvada [Change Location]

Blog Entry 23 of 24 Arvada: The way it was, the way it is, the way it could be.
I moved to Arvada in 1975, getting to spend my formative years growing up here, watching it change, breaking several municipal codes, and seeing how much trouble I could get in without my parents actually finding out. I moved back to Arvada a year ago, and while my contacts with the local authorites have drastically gone down hill, my fond memories of growing up here havent. My writings will be about the times I spent growing up here, the friends I grew up with, the trouble we got in, the stuff we got away with, and basically anything else that spews forth from my brain. I graduated from Arvada High School in 1985 (Go Redski...oops, go Reds...oops....go Bulldogs, or Wombats, or Tibetan Spitting Lamas, or whatever they are called these days). I spent 10 years on the Comedy circuit, but these days prefer to spend time with my wife, my dog, and whatever poor souls end up on a poker table with me. When I post a story, please feel free to write me back with your memories. I would like to know if I was the only one who remembers seeing Young Frankenstien at the Wadsworth drive in, or tried desperately to lose his virginity on a carpeted mushroom at US on Wheels.

Best and worst of 2008, at least in my opinion


Greetings and Happy Holidays all of you Your Hub addicts. Its been awhile since I have had the chance to spew forth some mind numbing thoughts, so I thought I would take this chance to reflect on 2008. This would be my list of the best and worst things of 2008. You might disagree, and if you do, feel free to drop a comment and let me know how I have the insight of a drunken tree sloth.

Best Part of the Democratic National Convention: Courtney, our cabana waitress at the Shark Tank at the Golden Nugget in Las Vegas. While I'm sure watching the arrests of 150 peace loving 20somethings made for high entertainment, it paled in comparison to the bikini wearing waitress who brought endless buckets of beer to our cabana. If your in Vegas anytime soon, I highly recommend making a visit to the Nugget.

Best Movie to Creep Out Your Wife of 2008: The Strangers. The only person in this movie I have ever heard of is Liv Tyler, and that's just because I remember the school girl outfit from her dad's Aerosmith video. Regardless, the movie has some serious creep/jump factor. Thoroughly enjoyable way to kill a Saturday night.

Worst Movie Idea of 2008 or Any Other Year For That Matter: Valkryie. Seriously. Christmas day release of a Nazi flick starring the dude from Top Gun. Not that I have seen this movie, or will I ever see this movie. Lets face it, the apex of Tom Cruise's career came with the massively uncomfortable man-hug he gave Val Kilmer after dusting the Russians in his F-15. Although his effort as the fat bald guy in Tropic Thunder was pretty entertaining.

Best Place to Watch Football, Drink Beer, Play Holdem, Play Beer Pong, or Just Hang Out: Time Out Sports Bar, 88th and Sheridan. They have poker 3 nights a week, have a great DJ on Saturdays and select other nights of the week, the Philly Cheesteak and chicken wings are seriously tasty, they have a great waitstaff and bartenders, and one of the TVs has a small hole in the screen where the worlds worst dart player decided to take a shot a Jay Cutlers butt awhile back. Even with the hole in the screen, its still a great place to hang out.

Worst Sports Moment of 2008: This category has all kinds of contenders. The Broncos last 3 weeks, the demise of the Colorado Crush. Joe Sakic trying to use a snowblower (dude, your worth 40 million bucks, hire somebody). But at the top of my list was the decision by the MonFARTS to trade Matt Holiday to the A's for a center fielder that cant hit, a relief pitcher that can't find the plate, and a bag of balls. (Thanks to Your Hub for letting me write "bag of balls" without getting censored). The run to the World Series was a magical time, and we get repaid for showing by having our best player unceremoniously dumped to Oakland. Sometimes I hate the Rich and Unthankful. No wait, I always hate the Rich and Unthankful.

Best Sports Moment of 2008: Trading Allen Iverson and his collection of unidentifiable tattoos to Detroit for Chauncey Billups. Got rid of a point guard who shoots 30 times a game for a point guard who.....nevermind. He is a point guard. Enough said.

Best Part of Getting My Haircut at Cost Cutters next to King Soopers at 64th And Sheridan: Watching the stylists laugh while I try not to have an involuntary bladder evacuation from those clippers on the back of my neck. It was bad when I was a kid, its embarrasing as an adult. Love the ladies that work there, but I swear sometimes they overdo it just to watch me have a seizure. Oh, and the haircuts are great.

Celebrity who Died in 2008 That I Will Miss the Most: George Carlin. No talent joke stealinghacks like Carlos Mencia and CarrotTop are in tip top shape, and Carlin finally succumbs to heart attack number 11. Just doesnt seem fair. I know that not everyone embraced Carlins technique,but youcant deny the tenacity or the fact that he was willing to go where others were scared to.

Celebrity that Didn't Die in 2008 That Should Have: Paris Hilton/ Lindsay Lohan/ Britney Spears. I don't even know why Paris is a celebrity. Or that somehow she thinks shes a role model. She needs to clock out immediately. Lindsay has some talent, but has the IQ of a turnip. Britney has done the impossible in 2008. She has made Kevin Federline look like the responsible adult of the family. All 3 have used up waaaaaaay too much oxygen that could be going to deserving people this year.

There, I feel better. I hope all of you had a wonderful and healthy 2008, and I wish you nothing but the best for 2009. Its been my pleasure reading all of your blogs, and I hope you have enjoyed mine as well. Until next time, wear something bright and stay low.








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Hi Patrick. I missed you. I will look for you at Cost Cutters.

Nice to have you back ... Funny stuff!
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