Article Contributed on: 8/7/2007 8:36:42 PM
Here in Taos, New Mexico, you see a lot of nice sunsets. But last night's sunset was something special. It was something amazing. It was a birthday present to my Mom from God. It was every color that fire comes in. Red and yellow and orange and purple. To north and to the south were spectacular lightning storms. God sure knows how to put on a show!
So I came back to Boulder to see my mommy for her berfday. It was great. The whole family together. Its amazing when it happens. Big Sis. Big Bro. Lil Neice. Me. The Momma and the Pappa.....not to mention the plethora of pets that we have here now.
It seems that every time I come back here there is a new animal. This time its a new grey and white cat named, Fritzle. That cat is the perferct addition to our other cat, Fluffy. We also got 4 dogs now: Journey, Honey, Snowflake, and Lil Legs. All of these animals have been saved from animal shelters. You could say that my mommy has a soft spot for saving cute pets' lives.
Today, my mother and I went hiking. According to Dmitri Martin, hiking is just walking where you can pee. I agree. I don't get people who taking hiking super seriously. With Camelbacks and expensive hiking boots. I prefer to hike in sandles...flipflops. That way you can dip your feet in the creek anytime you want.
The hike was one of the best I ever had. I came upon epiphany after epiphany. I even came up with at least 4 new blog topics. I even understand WHY I blog, now.
Its tough to explain how clear my thoughts become here in Taos, especially on that hiking trail. But you can trust me, its a clearity that is hard to come by, dang near impossible in a big city.
I realized today how my personality is kinda 2 different personalities. I have an Alpha personaltiy. Thats personality that meditates and reads books by Deepak Chopra. He's the one that sits quietly by a creek or contemplating love in a hot tub. He is the one that eats healthy and thinks thoughts for the sake of thinking them. He's the one that contemplates God, Time, Infinitude, and Love. It's the one that beleives in mystysim.
This personality is in direct contrast with my Beta personality. That's the college party animal type. The one that likes to be center of attention. The one that loves to drink and party. The one that goes out to bars every weekend to pick up chicks ( unsuccessfully, of course.) Its the one that wants to be as a man-$lut. The one that watches sports and gets hammered and likes to "have fun."
These 2 parts of myself are constantly at war. I dont know which one I like being more. I love to sit and think about the Future, and God, and my Life. I like to sit and say "Thank You" to the Universe which has provided me with so much. I like to thank God, for making me the person who I am today. But then again, I also love to go take shots of whiskey and ride my bike around acting like a dang fool. I love to drink and yell and rough house with my freinds. I like to watch Ultimate Fighting with a freaking keg in my lap...to play golf and to attempt to womanize. All that fun stuff that everybody likes to do. The everybody that yells, "GO BRONCOS" or "GO ROCKIES" out of a speeding car window.
Im torn. Im conflicted.
Do other people have to polar opposite personalites fighting for power? I know I sure do. It's what makes me, me. I am extrodiarily complex. I love being so complex. Just figuring myself out is a tough enough job with out having a girlfreind to figure out too.... Which reminds me.... I really appricate singledom finally after that hike. Singledom used to instill in me a somewhat feeling of loneliness and fear. I changed that today. Now singledom is synonomous with possiblity. Potential. Unlimited potential. Phew. Finally. Took long enough. Turns out you can change your perception with as little effort as changingyour intention.
Mang. What a good hike! I need to meditate more often....In fact, I'm gonna go mediate in the hot tub right now.
peace out.