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Stains in the chain of command

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Contributed by: Barbara Neff on 5/13/2006

Can you dress up excrement and make it fudge? If you wrap excrement in fine lace or present it in a gold box, can it be sweet and delectable? If you call excrement by another name, something clever and nice, will it be magically transformed into something tasty, cherished or appreciated?

Only a fool would think so.

Many who don't consider themselves foolish seem to believe something equally idiotic; that hitting children can be dressed up, called by another name, prefaced with certain words or followed by certain acts and magically transformed into something good for children.

As the recipient in childhood of many forms of corporal punishment, I know the eternal sting. I remember lingering palms prints and recall the bruising of my spirit. The blows stung, but paled in comparison to the searing wounds to my dignity and self worth.

No matter how my mother tried to dress it up, the fact of her having struck me can never be altered or diluted. The act of an adult hitting a child is the worst form of insult, the lowest kind of disregard, blatant violation of trust.

Adults who recall and decry corporal punishment are often told the hitters in their childhood apparently didn't hit the proper way. Had they, some supporters of corporal punishment assert, adult survivors wouldn't feel resentful. Had hitters followed bizarre sets of rules for hitting, adult survivors should feel good about having been struck. Had childhood hitters said the right words, hit the right number of times in the right places on children's bodies with the right amount of force, adult survivors should be well adjusted and, perhaps more importantly, effective adult child hitters themselves, supporters of corporal punishment maintain.

King Solomon in the Old Testament's Book of Proverbs appears to advocate the beating of children with a "rod." Bible interpretations aside, I frankly don't care what the misguided might choose as their tenuous base for child hitting. No logical basis exists. I am certain no loving creator would actually condone the striking of children by adults. One simply cannot dress up violence in religious robes and make it right.

Hitting and demeaning children, inextricably joined, serve no moral purpose. Sure, one can easily manipulate the behaviors of others through the use of pain. Bullies do it all the time.

But, does fear of physical reprisal create goodness of heart? What does submission as the result of hitting teach? That violence is acceptable? That the powerful can rightfully mistreat the less powerful? Doesn't it instill modified behavior rooted in fear rather than good behavior for the joy of goodness itself? How can the sane believe striking children fosters fairness, compassion and mutual respect? Who could believe children dominated through pain will magically morph into caring adults who feel good about others and themselves?

No matter what you call it or how you dress it up. Sets of rules for its use be damned. Hitting smears stains on the souls of child victims for life.

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CONTRIBUTOR INFORMATION

Barbara Neff

Castle Rock , CO

Barbara Neff has posted 85 stories and 245 comments since joining on 9/14/2005. Barbara Neff 's average story rating is 4.87.

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