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It's a bird! It's a plane! It's...WEATHER!
Contributed by: Anthonette Klinkerman on 12/12/2007

Weather is something Californians just don't have. The minute a cloud appears and something falls out of it, a Californian will crash his or her car into the nearest object. Varying degrees of sunshine year in and year out don't make for excellent drivers when there's an unexpected drop of moisture from above.

Weathermen have to get creative in the Golden State and start dubbing the tedious weather patterns things like "hazy sunshine", "smoggy sunshine", and "sunshine lite".

The lack of seasons is probably why most Southern Californians move to Colorado. We want to see this thing called "weather" up close. Really, how hard could driving in snow be? Besides, where I taught in San Diego, about 22 miles inland, it was 110 degrees in October and I distinctly recall whining, "I just want to wear a sweater!"

I personally found out how difficult driving in the snow is on February 14, 2001. Happy Valentine's Day to me. We had moved here over the previous summer, and I was driving to Castle Rock Middle School for work. On Meadows Parkway, I learned very quickly that if the light turns yellow and the streets are snow-packed, you don't slam on the brakes. My Taurus slid right into a curb, nearly knocking off the front axle. I limped my car to school because it was Day Two of something called CSAP testing and I couldn't be late. I spent a romantic evening with my husband at a middle school, waiting for the exhausted tow truck driver.

It seems CSAP trumps weather, taking no pity on inexperienced snow drivers. A hand sign needs to be created to represent CSAP in your next rock-paper-scissors game because it would beat everything. (Keep it clean, people.)

Students are especially grumbly on days they perceive could be a "snow day". As they shuffled in on a delayed schedule recently, I took the brunt of their frustration.

"WHY aren't we on a snow day??"

"You're asking the wrong person," I replied. "I'm not in charge. If I were, everyone would be taking cover somewhere."

According to students, the school district person who decides to call snow days lives in a pile of snow in a freezer buried in a glacier in Alaska.

On my first snow day in Colorado, I was up and watching the news reports from 5:00 a.m. until 8:00 a.m., completely fascinated. Brave reporters stood in the falling fluff, announcing other brave souls were out driving in it, headed for Krispy Krème. I then went out and shoveled three times. My husband, who grew up in Littleton, told me to go right ahead.

Last winter had me rethinking a few things. Snowfalls of late have me still intrigued, but a bit more cautious.

I'm the slow one in the minivan, gripping the steering wheel and unable to return that odd wave, so feel free to go around me.


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Showing 1-3 of 3 comments
Submitted By: Anthonette Klinkerman
posted on 12/23/2007 @ 11:25:37 AM
(Not Rated)
Maybe we ought to have a "YourHub teaches Klinkerman to drive in the snow" party. ha-ha
[Report as objectionable]
Submitted By: Brendan Leonard
posted on 12/13/2007 @ 1:43:43 PM
Rated Story
Apparently the upper parking lot at Red Rocks is a great spot for doing donuts...
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Submitted By: Michael Rule
posted on 12/13/2007 @ 8:19:48 AM
Rated Story
Every year another bunch of snow rookies are indoctrinated. Take it from a guy who grew up where "Black Ice" isn't a rap group; Donuts on a snow covered, empty parking lot are FUN!!!!
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Showing 1-3 of 3 comments
CONTRIBUTOR INFORMATION

Anthonette Klinkerman

Castle Pines North

Anthonette Klinkerman has posted 78 stories and 44 comments since joining on 4/14/2006. Anthonette Klinkerman 's average story rating is 4.95.
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