As I was driving down the freeway I got to thinking, there's been a lot of prophetizing and theorizing about slowing it down to 55 mph so we can save on gas. Maybe its true, maybe its not, I'm not really here to spin that yarn. The yarn I intend to spin is the one where I kindly point out the almost glaring on the nose opportunistic ommision to conicide with thesuckering of...err... enlightening us, on why we should jump on the 55 mph trolley...
Sammy Hagar...the Red Rocker. Remember
I Can't Drive 55? Government, are you reading me? Commision the guy. Get him to flip his switch so we can make
I CAN Drive 55 our new anthem.
But wait, there's more....
A little extra money should be put aside for a music video. In the video, the Red Rocker can be cruising around in his
Prius or
Smart Car while everyone he comes across on the freeway, at stop lights, et al, gives him a big thumbs up for his gas saving awesomeness. There should be celebrity cameos singing the chorus, just like the video
Ray Parker Jr. did for
Ghostbusters...heck you can probably get most of the celebrities who were in that video to do the same here. What celebrity wouldn't want to do this? They love to tell us how we should conduct our lives. I also feel the video should feature
Burt Reynolds in full Bandit gear, kicking it old school again so he and Sammy can cruise around together and bask in the glow of driving responsibly and saving money. Maybe they crack jokes about how they used to drive fast, but now it's just silly and uneconomical. Burt can say something like "
Hey Sammy, I thought you couldn't drive 55"? Sammy turns to Burt and says "
Burt, if I drive over 55, not only will I be losing money, but you might lose your toupee". I'm laughing already. I just had thought, what if in in the video, the Red Rocker and the Bandit take the money they saved and stimulate the economy at
Subway (product tie in)... my God this is win win.
I've done a little leg work on my end and taken the liberty of changing some of the words in I Can't Drive 55 to fit the new campaign. Of course Sammy, if you're reading this, feel free to change it around... but my version is pretty sick.
One foot on the brake and none on the gas, hey!
Well, there's too much traffic, I shoudn't pass thou.
So I give my best fuel efficient move
A big black and white won't come and krush my groove.
CHORUS:
Go on & high five me for that 55
Excitement on my face, I'm not dead, I'm alive
Keepin my license n' all that jive
I can drive 55! Oh Yeah, Oh.
So I signed my name on number 24, hey!
Yeah the judge said, "Boy, just do your part
I'm gonna throw you a job at the city joint.
Looked me in the eye, said, "You get my point?"
I said "Yeah!, Oh yea!"
CHORUS II:
Go on & high five me for that 55
Excitement on my face, I'm not dead, I'm alive
Keepin my license n' all that jive
I can drive 55! Oh Yeah, Oh.
Oh, yea!
I can drive 55! (four times)
Uh! (Solo)
When I drive that slow, you know I save my dough
And I don't need to get my car out of second gear.
What used to take two hours now takes all day.
Huh - day trip of 16 hours to get to L.A...Yay!!!
CHORUS:
Go on & high five me for that 55
Excitement on my face, I'm not dead, I'm alive
Keepin my license n' all that jive
I can drive 55! Oh Yeah, Oh
Yes, yes, yes, I can drive...(I can drive 55!)
I can drive... (I can drive 55!)
I can drive 55!
When everyone has this song on their
iPod, computer, whatever, you can thank me later.
Just doing my part.
Paul Hughes.
P.S. This will be even better than when
Feist (iPod lady for the unitiated) flipped her switch on
1234 for Sesame Street. Check Youtube for that one...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9fciD_II7NI...genius.