It's the holiday season and as my friends are toting their kids to the local mall to sit on Santa's lap with wish lists in hand, or decorating Christmas trees and hanging up lights and wreaths, I am pulling out the family menorah and checking to make sure we are stocked up on Chanukah candles. I also go through my kids' library of books to find their "Chanukah Bugs" book and the few others we have about the holiday. At the same time, I am also dusting off my collection of Christmas CDs to play over the next few weeks. And I wonder if this is how the holidays are for other interfaith families.

I say interfaith, but really I don't think there is a term to describe our family. My husband is Jewish and I am not, so while Chanukah and the other Jewish holidays are a part of my present and my future, they have not been a part of my past. At the same time, Christianity has never really been a part of my past either, but I did grow up celebrating Christian holidays, namely Christmas and Easter.

I come from a mostly nonreligious family. While my father was baptized Methodist, I have never known him to attend church or practice Christianity. My mother comes from Buddhist roots, and while I would consider her a spiritual woman, her involvement with any organized religion has been similar to my father's. Nevertheless, my entire extended family has always celebrated Christmas and even though I have married into a Jewish family, we still celebrate this Christian holiday with my family.

Before my husband and I were married, we agreed that we would raise our children Jewish. It seemed an easy and logical decision given both of our backgrounds and it has taken a natural course as the kids have gotten older. We attend various services as a family at Temple Micah, we host Passover dinner at our house every year, and in a few years our children will attend religious school to further their Jewish education. The thing is Chanukah seems to be the one Jewish holiday filled with so many gray areas because it falls at around the same time as Christmas. It's like the four questions at Passover:

1) Do Jews have Chanukah decorations the way those who celebrate Christmas have the lights and the trees? I can't ever recall seeing a giant plastic menorah on anyone's lawn the way some people display giant plastic nativity scenes on their lawns, but maybe such things exist. Not that I'm looking for something plastic to display on our lawn, but I am curious.

2) What kinds of gifts are given on each night of Chanukah? As a child I was always jealous of my Jewish friends because they got one gift every night for eight nights, but as an adult I've been hearing stories of how Jewish kids around the country receive very small gifts like a pair of socks or a box of cereal on each night.

3) How do you spell Chanukah? Is it Hanukkah, Chanukkah, Hanukah, Chanukah, Hanukka, or Chanukka?

4) What are Jewish children told about Santa? I once heard a story of how a Jewish kid told his mom Santa would be visiting his house and she turned around and wrote him a letter from Santa explaining that he wouldn't be visiting the kid because he's Jewish. A little early for a rejection letter if you ask me, but my husband and I have been discussing what we will tell our kids about Santa when they ask, and we've decided to tell them that Santa visits Grandma's house because Grandma celebrates Christmas.

The truth of the matter is even though I am new at celebrating Chanukah with my kids, I am finding that it is just like any other holiday be it Jewish, Christian, or even American - there is no right or wrong answer. I know of several Jews who have Christmas trees in their houses and are visited by Santa. And I have come to learn that there are about just as many styles of menorahs as there are Christmas ornaments, as many potato latke recipes as there are Christmas cookie recipes, and as many Chanukah traditions as there are Christmas traditions. The thing about starting a family is that you also start your own traditions based on influences from your past. Even though I am not Christian and live in a Jewish household, I don't need to let go of Christmas and even though we don't have a tree at our house, I take comfort in knowing that my kids will still be able to decorate a Christmas tree and see Christmas lights at their grandmother's house. At the same time, I love shopping for Chanukah gifts and lighting the menorah candles every night. And I love that my son has already learned the "Dreidel, Dreidel" song and that he loves lighting the candles and when he woke up this morning he came into our room and said, "Today is Chanukah! I'm so exciting!" And he is exciting (and excited) - and so am I. Happy Chanukah!