I must be missing my woman gene. I don't like shopping, I'd rather watch football and I have no interest in my wedding. That's really too bad because I've been told the girl in white is kind of a key player.
Speaking of the dress - I could sure do without that. Apparently girls are paying an average of $800 for their dresses. I don't think I'd pay $800 in vet bills to keep my dog alive, let alone on a dress I'll wear for 4 hours. My dress cost the same amount as my groom's costume, and I still think I overpaid.
Honestly, I feel guilty. This is supposed to be the happiest day of my life - at least according to other giddy brides. Hmmm, I wonder if the fact that it is the most expensive day of their lives has any impact on that. My expectations aren't so high; I just want to get through it and get to the good part - the honeymoon.
Don't think my wedding reluctance has anything to do with marriage jitters. Actually, we've already been married 7 months and I never had so much as a second thought. But the wedding - well I've been against that since day one.
My poor husband had good intentions. He thought I'd enjoy planning the wedding (yeah, and some people enjoy giving blood too), and he had good reason. I've subscribed to wedding magazines since I was a kid. I liked looking at other people's weddings and seeing the beautiful flowers and exotic honeymoon locales, but I never for one second wanted a wedding of my own.
Yep, I'm definitely lacking some girly DNA.
It's not just the wedding itself that bothers me - I also hated registering for gifts. For someone who doesn't cook, receiving expensive wedding presents of cookware and appliances brings me back to that awful Christmas when I got a suitcase instead of the rollerblades I coveted. (Who buys an 11-year old a suitcase you ask? My mother).
I could care less what kind of pots and pans we get and I think we should be thrown in jail for registering for a blender over $100. After about a half hour in Bed, Bath and Beyond I felt nauseous. I let my husband pick out anything he wanted, but begged that he please do it online so I wouldn't have to miss the game.
On the plus side, my lack of interest sparked my photographer to say I'm his favorite client ever. I guess in his line of work you see a lot of bossy brides and my languid attitude could be perceived as refreshing to some. Other people think my apathy is downright odd or unnatural. Oh well.
My shame over my wedding-obsession deficiency leads me to go on plastering on my fake smile every time someone comes by asking how many days until the wedding (and what is up with people who actually know the exact number of days? It's extra freaky if the number is above 100). I'll have a good time once I get there, - next month, by the way - or at least that's what I keep telling myself. Luckily rum punch is a resort specialty.