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Blog Entry 257 of 357 Father Knows... Something. Let's figure out what.
This is my outlet to share with the world all the things I've learned - and continue to learn - about being the Father to 3 young children. But I should warn you that my experience is probably NOT yours: my wife and I adopted a sibling set of 3 - all 6 years old and younger - while in our 40's. We've heard that, "it keeps you young," but so far, it has mostly kept us tired... But like any parent, our kids teach us something new every day and I hope to share at least something here with you as I can. The entries will be short - time constraints will probably keep it at or around a mere 200-400 words - but as they say, brevity is the soul of wit. Let's hope I can create some brevity here. So if you read something you like, please leave a comment. If you read something you don't, please just leave. (Just kidding - I'd love to hear from critics as well.)

Learning from/of our kids


Dinner still - and always - proves to be an interesting time around here: It's always a craps-shoot as to which child will eat their fill, which child will decide to shuffle their food around their plate randomly and which will simply refuse to eat at all.

Oh sure it's made easier by our knowledge of our kids and their appetites, (Pasta? Binky, D-Man and "M." Steak? "M," D-Man and Binky. Salads? "M," D-Man and Binky. Lasagne? Binky, D-Man and "M." Actually, I think I'm starting to detect a pattern...), but there's a bit of a "wild card" aspect to whole thing, but only up to a point.

Which is to say that at the end of every meal - and no matter which end of the spectrum The Binkster's been a part of - he ends up playing around. He starts lifting his plate above (and onto) his head, throwing his fork and standing up in his high chair.

The usual stuff. Until recently...

The other night, as The Wif was cleaning and prepping The Bink to return to the wild that is our post-dinner routine, he stood up in his chair and leaned into her before she was ready. Surely a sign of great trust of her on his behalf, but it was interpreted differently from the other direction.

Witnessed by the fact that she said, "Ooof! We never had this trouble from your brother when HE was your age!" And I immediately stopped in my tracks. Such was I in a complete state of disbelief at what I'd just heard.

Being an adoptive parent, I somehow had concluded that the state of our relationships with our children would always be one that we'd never - but NEVER - be able to utter that phrase. After all, "I knew him when" would never be possible if I wasn't present at his birth, right? That has to be the case.

But as usual, The Wif made me realize that I'm a complete idiot with a single statement, (not that she sets out to do it, but I tend to make it like fish in a barrel for her), and I felt foolish immediately.

Of course we'd be able to look at one and point toward the other as time passed! It's so obvious in retrospect. Furthermore, it won't be much longer before we'd be able to make those same comparisons between "M's" development/behavior and the boys'. It's all so clear now!

But it's also clear that The Wif and I need to talk about such talk. Because I know for a fact that it either leads to or intensifies sibling rivalries -- and we've got enough of that around here already.

I'd write about it, but I'm afraid I'd get started and never stop...

Chris Stone is a slightly different - hopefully better - Father and man than he was yesterday...

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LOL! Now THAT'S the humor of truth! I just asked The Wif if it doesn't seem sometimes that our boys share a demon and she readily agreed. If I could rate comments, yours would get a 7 1/2, minimum. Thank you.

I found it impossible not to occasionally make those comparison statements, although I vowed not to. Now I just try to substitute euphemisms like "X never exhibited Y's unbridled energy and free-spirited enthusiam" in place of "X never showed signs of demonic possession."
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