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Blog Entry 22 of 333 Father Knows... Something. Let's figure out what.

This is my outlet to share with the world all the things I've learned - and continue to learn - about being the Father to 3 young children. But I should warn you that my experience is probably NOT yours: my wife and I are in the process of adopting a sibling set of 3 - all 6 years old and younger - while in our 40's. We've heard that, "it keeps you young," but so far, it has mostly kept us tired... But like any parent, our kids teach us something new every day and I hope to share at least something here with you at that same pace. The entries will be short - time constraints will probably keep it at or around a mere 200 words - but as they say, brevity is the soul of wit. Let's hope I can create some brevity here. So if you read something you like, please leave a comment. If you read something you don't, please just leave. (Just kidding - I'd love to hear from critics as well.)

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What did I just say?

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Contributed by: Chris Stone on 1/22/2007

If I had to guess, I'd say that all new parents go through a similar process; first it's shock and fear at all the unknowns that they're suddenly faced with, then it's the dreams of What's To Be for them and their child(ren), then the fear and shock of tending to the seemingly infinite needs of a newborn, only to finally settle into a comfortable pattern of routine - briefly punctuated by intense screams.

Whether by the child, your spouse or yourself. It hardly matters which.
And though these stages may not be universal to every experience, I think it's safe to say that there is one thing all new parents go through together. Namely the, "I'm never going to say (insert phrase here), like my Father did" phase...

It makes sense we would feel that way. After all, we were on the other end of things when we first heard that "special" phrase and we quickly learned to hate it. We started becoming experts as to why it was so wrong sometime around our 12th birthday and have had all the years since to refine and perfect our view.

And in all that contemplation we've only found reason to reinforce our belief: THAT was wrong. So wrong that I'll be sure to NEVER say it to MY children.

So imagine the shock when we hear that very phrase for the first time in years -- and it's in our voice!

Somehow, we have managed to not only continue a line of what must surely be considered child abuse, but have destroyed a promise made by that most valued of today's creatures: a 12 year old child! How can I go on?!?

Relax. This isn't the end of the world. Try to take some comfort in the fact that the first time your Dad said it he shocked himself, too. And you said it for the same reason he did -- because it works. (Sure, it's not the best of reasons but at least there is one.) And there's only ONE way he knew how well it worked.

But I leave you with one word of warning: If you ever even think of saying, "I'll GIVE you a reason to cry!", then the child already has a reason to do so.. .

Chris Stone is a slightly different - hopefully better - Father and man than he was yesterday...

< Previous: 'All too many meanings ...' | Next: 'Life in The Store....' >

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CONTRIBUTOR INFORMATION

Chris Stone

Arvada , CO

Chris Stone has posted 333 blog entries and 145 comments since joining on 7/6/2006. Chris Stone 's average blog rating is 5.

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