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Saying goodbye to a friend

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Contributed by: Erin Di Paolo on 9/29/2007

I hate goodbyes. Of course, they are part of life. The worst kind of goodbye is when someone dies, but a close second is when a friend moves away.

Fortunately for me, I have not experienced many of either kind of goodbyes But, unfortunately for me, when I do experience it, it is BIG, as it is now, since my good friend Lori has moved to Illinois.

Lori and I have been friends for years, about 7 or 8. Her daughter, Faith, and my daughter, Allie, are best friends. Lori is not only one of my best friends, but also one of the best people I know.

When Lori informed me she was moving, I prayed it would not come to pass. After all, she had mentioned moving before, but it never materialized. This time, reality smacked me in the face as I drove to her house a few days ago and saw a moving van in front of her house. I nearly lost it, but could not afford to since I was on my way to work. Instead, I fought back the tears.

Later that night, my friend, Melissa, and I toasted Lori. She is a person who has meant much to us, even more so in the past few years. Even though I didn't feel like toasting her or like laughing, it's impossible not to as the memories we have made together make it only natural to do both.

So we reminisced: about our recent trip to Vegas, about when our kids were younger, about issues we were having with our husbands, and, in Lori's case, her ex-husband with whom she is trying to reconcile.

It was inevitable that the laughter would give way to tears as 1:30 a.m. closed in. First Melissa said her good-byes, as she and Lori clung to each other, sobbing, saying their I love yous.

Then it was my turn to cry. Again, clinging, I love yous, and platitudes that didn't do justice to the real feelings hiding under the surface, feelings that cannot be put into words. After all, how do you condense eight years of gratitude and friendship into a few moments?

As I left, I thought of the countless times I'd left Lori's house before, never realizing there would ever be a last time. The finality of her moving away, probably forever, struck me.

I glanced at her front door as I drove away, not expecting to see her there. But there she was, standing, watching me. I waved, she waved and she remained there, wiping tears from her face.

In that moment, I wondered what she was thinking. Was she thinking of all the things we'd done or not done, said or not said? Was she grieving over an unknown future? Or was she simply thinking the same thing as I? That it is so hard to say goodbye to one who has meant so much and harder still to find a true friend.

God speed, Lori. I will miss you more than you'll ever know.

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CONTRIBUTOR INFORMATION

Erin Di Paolo

Denver , CO

Erin Di Paolo has posted 63 blog entries and 1 comment since joining on 3/18/2006. Erin Di Paolo 's average blog rating is 4.55.

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