Article Contributed on: 3/29/2006 1:17:22 PM
Used to be, if you had pack rat-like tendencies, were an
inveterate nostalgist, or simply personified the old bit about a
fool and his money, you had to go to a little bit of effort to
translate your native lack of judgment into actual economic damage
to your family's well-being.
No longer. With the advent of online shopping (or more
specifically, with the creation of eBay), we - the financially
incompetent and/or kitsch-intensive - are no longer banished to the
flea markets and antique malls of the community. Instead, we stay
safe and warm in our homes and offices, blissfully shelling out our
hard-earned cash for all manner of silliness. Huzzah!
I really
do mean ALL manner, too.
A year or so ago, some joker convinced countless folk to bid on a
"demon possessed" Coke can, and wound up getting more than $300 for
the thing. Just this morning, about fifteen seconds of eBay
searching yeided an auction belonging to a Canadian college student
who - typical starving, short-sighted frat boy, no doubt - wishes
to sell his immortal soul to the highest bidder. The bidding starts
at a cool ten grand, so if you're in the market, you'd better be
ready to bring the greenbacks. On the plus side, he's generously
offered to pay the shipping costs. Good thing, too, since those
Customs guys at the border can be pretty touchy about international
soul shipments. Something about the Daniel Webster Act of 1783, if
I remember correctly...
Delving a bit into our young seller's eBay history, we
discover that the only other item that he's ever auctioned was a
collection of
Stargate SG-1 episodes.
What this particular activity might reveal about the condition of
his soul I'm not too sure.
Still, one
can find some pretty neat
stuff online, and I'm a big eBay booster and user. I sell things
from time to time, and have bought everything from a complete
collection of old fairy tale picture books for my mom (coolest
Christmas gift in years, I tell you...), to our current clothes
dryer. Oh...lest you be led to believe, somehow, that my more
typical eBay activity is
as dreadfully utilitarian and uninteresting as the previous
purchases must make it sound, allow me to disabuse you of the
notion posthaste. Fact is, I've snagged - and will likely continue
to do so - all manner of frivolous artifacts via eBay auction.
Let's see, here...in the past two years, or so, I've bought
spare parts for some of my old Transformer toys (Starscream
needs his fists, you
know...), a Cobra Kai t-shirt from
The Karate Kid ("Strike
first, strike hard, no mercy, SIR!"), and too many other assorted
knicknacks to mention.
In this same time, I have come to appreciate my wife more and
more with each passing day. She has, thus far, resisted what must
be a powerful compulsion to sneak up behind me and smack me in the
back of the head for my repeated visits to NostalgiaLand, by way of
eBay. I admire - and appreciate - her restraint.
We live in a Golden Age for geeks, my friends. Whether your
interests tend toward the iconic or the ironic, there's something
out there for you. Now, as to how you explain things to your spouse
upon the arrival of said treasure, and its prominent display in
your home? Can't help you there.
Happy hunting.