Sunday Bloody Sunday (1971) Directed by John Schlesinger. With Peter Finch, Glenda Jackson, Murray Head. Visit IMDb (Internet Movie Data Base for those who haven't gotten past Batman) for Photos, Showtimes, Cast, Crew, Reviews, Plot Summary, Comments, ...(Thanks to Google for info. Seven out of ten stars.)

Track Your Package
(Found the following notation on Sunday morning.)
Date: July 19, 2008
Time: 09:13:00 AM
Location: DENVER CO
Event Details: Delivery Attempted

Strange as I was sitting here all day, writing a lengthy article for my Zit Journal, and never heard a knock nor the ring of the doorbell. So I checked the front door for a SORRY WE MISSED YOU! card. The one I need to show the post office that someone attempted to deliver the package.

Nothing on the storm door that half the glass fell out of about 18 years ago. Nothing on the ground. Unless I counted the several empty cigarette packs and a stomped-on pop can. So they didn't miss me at what's left of my front door.

I went to the mail box. Empty. Just like it's been for most of the week. Sometimes I feel like the Omega Man.

Now I know that you're not going to believe this, but after digging far enough on the Amazon site (namely under HELP!!!), I actually found a button that claimed if I clicked it a real live person would answer the phone and help me with my problems. On Sunday. Sure. Try and get the post office in Canada on Sunday.

My phone is digital, Comcast, and is hooked to the Internet. So I clicked the button and, I swear, within one second the phone rang. After a 15 second digital phone message I couldn't understand a word of, a real human voice answered. I got so excited that I clicked the "HANG UP" button by mistake, disconnected, and had to start all over.

All I had to do is give the operator my name and he was onto my order. Yep. Delivery Attempted. Only I told him I was here, didn't hear any attempt, and nobody left me a SORRY WE MISSED YOU card so I could call the post office tomorrow.

Of course he didn't know what happened but he said not to worry about the post office. They were using another more expensive delivery system that should by-pass Uncle Sam and the packages should be delivered again tomorrow.

Okay, so there's one thing I didn't tell you yesterday. When the original package of four book wasn't delivered on July 10 th, I got depressed. And there's only one thing I know of I can do for depression. So by Saturday, July 12, 2008, when I went back on Amazon, still looking for my July 3 package, I ordered three DVD's. The DVD's are also missing at the moment but with four books, three DVD's, two afternoons of modeling, and tomorrow night's The Mole show, I should be back in fairly good shape by the end of the week.

Since Amazon knew I was having problems with the delivery and had, by this time, resent the first four books but this time in two packages (the one containing one book having now arrived), they sent the old book orders and new DVD order by DHL At Home. So the expert answering the phone is fairly sure that the three books and the three DVD's will arrive tomorrow. If not, I'm to call Amazon back and they will put Plan B into effect. I understand that Amazon is one of the few places that does have a Plan C although it is seldom used. But in my case they might just have to pull it out and dust it off.

So from now on, I'll order small quantities of items from Amazon and pay the over-night rate which should get them delivered in a couple of days instead of almost three weeks.

Now you may be wondering, like a guy up at the Jeffco Work Force I was talking to, how I quit working full time after I got laid off at 54 from Sherman & Howard and still have plenty of money to fight depression and get books and DVD's at the same time.

I told him I met this lady who was the president of a very successful company and that I promised her we would get married as soon as my mother died if she'd give me $20,000 a month.

"How old is your mother?" he asked.
"She'd be over 100 but she died almost 12 years ago," I told him.
"So you're married?"
"Well, not exactly. I haven't told her she's dead yet."