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Lakewood couple celebrates adoption of daughter
Contributed by: Erin Feese/YourHub.com on 11/18/2007

The usually solemn atrium of the Jefferson County courthouse echoed with the joyful sounds of children Nov. 17 as families celebrated National Adoption Day.

Jessica and Matt Stiles were among the 24 families who finalized their adoption. The Lakewood couple welcomed 1-year-old Jocelynn as an official part of the family.

About having completed the adoption process, Jessica said, "I feel fulfilled and peaceful and a bit emotional. It's a fun day to celebrate with family."

Matt and Jessica, who have been married 11 years, are originally from the East Coast and have lived in Lakewood for six years. Jessica is a stay-at-home mom and Matt runs a wholesale distribution company.

The couple had been trying to get pregnant for a few years, and although doctors could never pinpoint anything wrong with them, no baby was on the way. They heard about adoption through friends who were going through the process and decided to look into it.

"We were tired of waiting (for a child)," Matt said.

The Stiles have been fortunate, as their adoption has gone very smoothly and quickly, they said. Jefferson County has been great every step of the way, they added.

"The people who work at Jeffco Human Services are some of the best people in the world," Matt said.

"We definitely think we'd do it again," Jessica said.

To becomes adoptive parents, the Stiles first had to take 24 hours of classes to certify them as a foster family before a child could be placed in their home.

"It opened up a whole new area to us," Jessica said. "We never knew this existed, that it was possible to adopt from the state."

Once they were certified, they had to undergo background checks, home study visits and interviews.

"We were asked questions we've never been asked before -- really intimate questions," Jessica said. "They have to determine if you're a healthy married couple, and if this a good environment to bring a baby."

Matt said, "We were nervous at first, but if you have nothing to hide, there's really nothing to be nervous about."

The couple was ready to take in a child in January 2007. The first child they received was an infant boy, who later had to be returned to his birth parents. Although adoptive foster parents are matched with children they have a good chance of adopting, there is always a possibility the child will be returned to his or her birth family.

"It was very hard (to give him up), but gratifying doing a good thing for him," Matt said.

"We knew the best thing for him was to be back with his family," Jessica said.

Since receiving Jocelynn in February, Matt and Jessica have channeled their unwavering patience to give the baby a fresh start. Jocelynn was born addicted to methamphetamine, so she can be a little more high-strung, Jessica said.

"As a parent, you just have to learn to hone in on the needs of your child," she said.

Jessica said Jocelynn also attends physical therapy to help develop her gross motor skills.

However, she is typically a happy baby you would never know has been drug-exposed, Jessica said.

Families wanted

submitted by Julia Taylor


Parenting is an immensely satisfying experience ... involving smiles, giggles, lessons-learned, wisdom and most of all love. It takes commitment, persistence and sometimes a leap of faith. And, in Jefferson County, 24 families are planning to take that leap of faith by formalizing adoptions on National Adoption Day, November 17, at the Jefferson County Courthouse.

National Adoption Day is a time when courts, judges, attorneys, clerks, adoption professionals, child welfare agencies and advocates all come together to finalize adoptions and find permanent, loving homes for children in foster care.

"National Adoption Day brings awareness of the positive impact that adoption has on our society," said Judge Brian Boatright, who will be officiating some of the adoptions that day. "It's an incredible experience to participate in the adoption process. Each adopted child is a unique soul who brings new perspectives, talents and joy to the family unit."

The message that Judge Boatright and Jefferson County child welfare advocates really want to get out there is that 30 children in Jefferson County and over 750 throughout Colorado are still waiting to find permanent homes. "If you've been considering foster adoption as an option, now is the time to step up and support the kids in your own community," said Judge Boatright.

"This is a big commitment; but, it's an important one," said Wendy Strait. Wendy and her husband Steve are both on their second marriage and would like to add to their family through a local adoption. "It breaks my heart that life has gone terribly wrong for some of these children. We are going through this process because we know that we can provide a child with the loving home he or she deserves. It just took a simple phone call to Jefferson County to get the process started."

Families interested in more information on foster adoption may call 303/271-4043 or visit Jefferson County's Adoption Services Website at http://jeffco.us/hs/.

National Adoption Day is sponsored nationally by The Alliance for Children's Rights, Casey Family Services, Children's Action Network, Congressional Coalition on Adoption Institute, Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption and Freddie Mac Foundation.


Since there aren't many studies on babies who have been exposed to meth, any possible long-term effects aren't known.

"But we believe love heals," Matt said.

Family members have been supportive of the adoption, albeit a bit cautious.


"They didn't want us to get our hearts hurt," Jessica said. "But they've always thought of her as their grandchild or niece."

About 20 of the Stiles' family members and friends came to the courthouse to celebrate the adoption. Matt's mother's, Wendy Stiles, beamed as she talked about welcoming Jocelynn to the family.

"We are so blessed," she said. "She is such a joy."

Matt's sister, Joelle Stiles, added, "We can't get enough of her."

When Jocelynn is old enough to understand, Matt and Jessica plan to be honest with her about the adoption.

"We've talked to people who have always known they've been adopted, and they're at peace with it," Jessica said. "And we've talked to people who didn't know until later, and they feel hurt and deceived."

"Our plan is to be very open and honest," Matt said. "She'll always know that we chose her."

For more information about adopting in Jefferson County, visit www.co.jefferson.co.us/hs or call 303-271-4043.

Adoption facts

Nationwide, there are 114, 000 children in foster care waiting to find permanent homes.

In Colorado, there aremore than750 children waiting. In Jefferson County alone, there are 30 in need of permanent homes.

The majority of children needing permanent homes are between the ages of 8 and 18.

80 percentof the adoptive parents are married couples. 20 percentare single parents.

The latest adoption trendsshow a5 percentincrease in single-parent adoptions in the last 3 years in Jefferson County.

Traits that Jefferson County is looking for in prospective foster adoption families include:

  • Desire to have more children
  • Patience
  • Good sense of humor
  • Commitment to be good parents
    • Flexibility
  • Realistic expectations
  • Willingness to seek out resources and help

Free services offered by Jefferson County for those considering local adoptions include an 8-week training class for potential adoptive parents.

Local adoptions are fairly inexpensive compared with international adoptions. The average local adoption costs less then $300. The average international adoption costs $15,000.




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Showing 1 of 1 comments
Submitted By: Katherine Jerome
posted on 11/18/2007 @ 2:01:00 PM
Rated Story
Jessica and Matt's story made me cry. Jocelynn is indeed very blessed to have such special parents. Being a parent is important, and also a whole lot of fun. What a great gift for the Holidays!!
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