As you can imagine, I spend a lot of my time just waiting to see what's new with "our girl." I see her periodically, but normally we aren't in an area where we can openly talk about what's going on in her life. Of course, when I see her, I always want to ask her what is going on, but always bite my tongue. So, much like many of the readers of this blog, I spend days on end wondering what is going on. Eventually, "our girl" and I get a chance to speak openly and I finally find out what's new. For those of you wondering, I am not a trained "counselor," but do have some special training that allows me to listen to and analyze problems, therefore, I get a lot of people approaching me looking for a friend willing to listen to their problems. In this case, "our girl" knows about this blog site and has agreed to allow me to write about her "saga." I've only agreed to not use her name or any pertinent details that would clearly identify her.
Anyway, we are wondering what the latest news is, so here it is.
"Our girl" has now entered into what I call The Abyss. This is that place where we know what we should do, but are having tremendous problems doing it. In other words, at this very moment, there is an epic battle being waged inside "our girl." The battle is basically between her heart and her brain. We are all screaming for her brain to win, but it appears her heart is slightly in the lead.
She has now confronted "the guy" and explained her position. That being that she knows he is seeing (or with) someone else and that she is no longer going to accept this. It is either her or the other girl and she isn't going to tolerate his "playing."
As many of you would suspect, "the guy" had a ready made excuse for his actions and basically said she was right about him seeing another girl. He quickly threw in that he had already decided to end the relationship with the other girl, but didn't want to hurt her and was moving "slowly."
At this point, we all know what needs to be done (much like "our girl's" brain) and know she needs to end it and move on with her life. Unfortunately, as I have said before, "our girl" really does like "the guy" and is afraid she won't meet anyone as nice if she gets rid of him. Therefore, her heart continues to tell her to give him a chance.
So, she continues to hold out hope that he is being honest and continues waiting for him to "dump" the other woman.
This all despite that we are now close to two months into this relationship and she hasn't had a single weekend date (the one Sunday night date doesn't count in my book). For a guy "ending" the relationship with the other woman, he sure isn't available to meet the needs of "our girl" (expect during strange Tuesday dates).
It is obvious to me this guy continues with his game. Unfortunately, as I predicted several posts back, he now clearly sees he has "our girl" right where he wanted her and will continue to take advantage of her.
I continue to preach my "run away" advice and hope "our girl" sees the wisdom of my words soon. She is already susceptible to heart break, but the farther we go, the more long-term damage she faces.
To read my other blog entries, please visit my other blog at: www.advice-smoke-and-mirrors.blogspot.com