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Blog Entry 32 of 45 Random Neural Firings
A data dump of whatever happens to be on my mind at the moment. So fasten your safety belts and clench your buttocks, this is going to be a bumpy ride! I'm a mild-mannered scientist by day, and a raving lunatic at night - and I just might be your neighbor! I grew up (though some say I haven't) in Deer Creek Canyon, in the old Glen Plym Ranch homestead next to What's now known as Deer Creek Mesa. Weekdays I commute to the University of Denver, where I work in atmospheric physics. Weekends I mostly spend trying to remodel the old homestead without ruining its historic character. Seeing as it's made of stone, that would actually be hard to do. Why I'm here, I'm not really sure... To find out more than you probably ever wanted to know about me, visit my (sadly outdated) web page at http://www.du.edu/~kmurcray

Blog Url: http://denver.yourhub.com/~PEREGRINE

Never sniff a gift fish

Contributed by: Kevin Murcray   on 7/12/2006

In my writing I strive to emulate that literary great of greats, Patrick F. McManus. With perhaps a touch (just a sledgehammer's worth) of W. Bruce Cameron sprayed in for flavor. But alas, strive as I might I cannot reach that pinnacle of greatness. I mean come on, Pat McManus has childhood friends like Retch Sweeny and Rancid Crabtree to write about. Who did I have? The dog, the cat and a couple of dumb brothers. It's just not fair.

Pat McManus also got out and did stuff during his childhood. I, on the other hand, spent my childhood trying to get out of doing stuff. Like shoveling manure (sort of like what I do here) and digging burdock and thistles for half a penny each.

Now, you may wonder why I'd want to get out of digging burdock and thistles when it was about the only way I had of earning any money. Well you see, there was a catch to it. We had to show six inches of root to get credit for each one. This proved somewhat difficult as we had a rather unusual type of soil. I think it's called Portland Cement. I had to literally jump on the shovel to get it into the ground. More often than not, the result was the shovel handle would smack me right in the nose right before I fell on my butt. The end result is that my childhood was one of abject poverty (not to mention injury), a condition which persists to this day.

My brothers and I had a special rule, "out of sight, out of sound" - if our parents couldn't see us, then we didn't hear them. Somehow I don't think we were unique in this, but anyway. What this meant was that as soon as we could escape, we did. Like Mom would send me out to burn a bag of trash in the incinerator, and I'd smuggle a few books out in the trash. Soon as I got the trash burning I'd take off somewhere and read my books. I lost some good books that way; sometimes I'd forget to take them out of the trash before setting it afire. Oops.

I had several places I'd sneak off to read my books. Grassy clearings here and there, slot caves there and here, and a number of treehouses scattered across the countryside. The treehouses were a really good bet because Mom didn't climb trees. What do kids do nowadays, with nowhere to build treehouses? One in particular I really liked; it was an elaborate three-story job - one story for each of us. I preferred the top story, as it was open on one end and provided an excellent view of the road. That way I could see if Mom left to go someplace and I could sneak back into the house. Only once I got so engrossed in my reading I rolled over, forgetting where I was. Fortunately my bones broke my fall.

So anyway I spent much time reading, and not much doing. Which is why Pat McManus has all sorts of books out like Real Ponies Don't go Oink!, The Night the Bear ate Goombaw, They Shoot Canoes Don't They? and of course Never Sniff a Gift Fish, and I don't. I guess I could try and make up for it by getting out and doing crazy stuff now, so that I had stuff to write about.

I'm taking off to go camping this weekend and half of next week with one sane person (even odds he cracks by day two) and three other maniacal nutbars. That should be a good start.


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Showing 1 of 1 comments
Submitted By: Bill Boucher
posted on 6/28/2006 @ 10:34:08 AM
Rated Blog Entry
I think you're also a little Twainish. Roll with your Huck Finn heritage. It's great reading.
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CONTRIBUTOR INFORMATION

Kevin Murcray

Littleton , CO

Kevin Murcray has posted 45 blog entries and 54 comments since joining on 2/27/2006. Kevin Murcray 's average blog rating is 4.96.
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