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Blog Entry 4 of 44 Welcome to The Retroplex
I'm usually in full-blown reminisce mode anyway, so why not make the rest of you poor saps suffer along with me, right?

Here, you'll find no shortage (well...unless I can't think of any new material) of meaningless but ultimately harmless bits of ephemera covering the past 20 or so years of pop culture, and my occasional interactions with it. Whether you're into the iconic or the ironic, sooner or later, I'll probably get around to it.
Watch, as the hilarity ensues! Or, if you prefer, gawk like a shocked passerby witnessing a horrible accident!

Blog Url: http://denver.yourhub.com/~TheRetroplex

B.A. Baracus is a horrible shot - I pity the fool.

Contributed by: Jared Keller   on 6/27/2006

Oh sure...my mom bravely fought the inevitable for awhile - banning certain TV shows, and gingerly trying to get me to use my allowance cash ($3 a week, baby!) on something other than cap guns and GI Joes, but really, she stood no chance.

I loved me some cap guns back in the day.

Little boys and toy guns...well, there's just not a lot to be done. My childhood friend Jamie? His mom forbade him from owning a single cap gun. His solution? Chew his toast into the approximate shape of a .45. Barring that? He'd simply craft a massive arsenal out of the pine branches that littered his family's property in New Mexico.

Jamie's an Albuquerque cop now, by the way.

In my mom's case, her motives were pure as the driven snow (love ya, mom!), and as a parent myself, I can't at all fault her for trying to shelter me from what one magazine at the time called "The most violent show on TV". The problem? That show was The A-Team. See, here's the deal: while, on any given episode, you were, in fact, likely to see somewhere upwards of 63,000 rounds fired from an assortment of Mini-14s, M-60s, or main battle tanks, no one... not a single living soul was ever hit by a round fired by Face, B.A., Murdock, or Hannibal in the show's entire run. For a group of elite SpecOps types, these guys were just LOUSY shots. It was all very embarassing, really.

In a similar vein, I was also banned - for a short time - from watching Scooby-Doo (scary ghosts), and The Dukes of Hazzard (because it was just too dumb).

While I was able to successfully argue my point that the former was simply filled with run of the mill villains who wore remarkably well-fitted masks, and would have gotten away with their schemes if it hadn't been for those meddling kids, I had no argument for her Dukes contention. Had me dead-to-rights on that one.

From Airwolf, to Knight Rider, to GI Joe, our action favorites as kids were remarkably bloodless.

Then again, my all-time favorite show is probably Magnum, P.I., and sure - Thomas could sling the lead from his 1911 when he needed to, but still, the big appeal to that show was always the humor (and the 308GTS).

Oh...then, of course, there was Miami Vice. Man, I'd forgotten how many people got offed on that show. To this day, I can't hear Phil Collins sing without expecting to see some cartel kingpin gunned down by Crockett and Tubbs (in slow motion, no less!), so that kind of derails my whole "bloodless" theory, doesn't it?

To sum things up: I have no idea where I was going with this.

Insert your own biting social commentary here.

Happy Monday!


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Showing 1 of 1 comments
Submitted By: Bill Boucher
posted on 6/28/2006 @ 10:26:43 PM
Rated Blog Entry
Did you have the camp with the repelling (sp?) tower?That and the mobile command vehicle were my faves.
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CONTRIBUTOR INFORMATION

Jared Keller

Littleton

Jared Keller has posted 44 blog entries and 57 comments since joining on 12/1/2005. Jared Keller 's average blog rating is 5.
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