Karin's Report on Lone Tree City Council Meeting, May 16

Okay, smut peddlers are not really imminent. Lone Tree City Council had to amend its zoning code, because courts have ruled cities can't ban "sexually-oriented businesses." We didn't really ban them before; we just restricted them to a zoning classification that didn't exist. (I think judges usually figure out stuff like that.) The council approved a plan that keeps "adult novelty stores" 1200 feet from churches, parks, libraries, schools, daycares, homes and other establishments with topless waitresses.

Apparently, the courts frown on limiting the size of strip clubs, too; so if Home Depot goes out of business, we could potentially have one of the biggest dens of "specified anatomical areas" viewing in the West. I'm guessing the community wouldn't support such a business (except while wearing dark glasses.) I can't picture Mayor Jack O'Boyle moonlighting as a doorman like Federal Heights Mayor Dale Sparks. Or, even better, following in the footsteps of Mayor Mike Smith of New Lenox, Illinois, who racked up $1462 on his government credit card at "Chicago's premier adult cabaret." (Chicago Tribune, May 3, 2006.) I don't think we give our mayor credit cards, though.

On a personal note, in 1980, I went to The Wild Goose in Los Angeles. (It costs a lot to live in L.A. and they had a great lunch special.) Mud wrestling was the scheduled event. A girl in a bikini approached me in the bathroom, telling me I'd better hustle if I was up next. It remains one of the greatest compliments I have ever received.

Other, less interesting, Council business included: There was no pen by the sign in sheet. Did someone steal it with the Chief of Police right there?

Douglas County News Press is apparently the paper to get for official Lone Tree news.

Elton Winters gallantly stepped aside for newly reelected Pat Braden to become Mayor Pro Tem (the mayor's stand-in), avoiding a potentially divisive vote.

A liquor license was granted to a new Japanese steakhouse/sushi place, even though they messed up their visual aid showing precisely where the liquor would be located.

Council voted to approve the lease with South Suburban for Fourth of July at Sweet Water Park. (Incidentally, I think Council should vote on whether it is "Sweet Water" or "Sweetwater," because they've used both.) The mayor asked that the lease include a clause allowing for delay due to wind. Maybe it was just me, but City Manager Jack Hidahl seemed grumpy about that.

We get to have Lone Tree Pool this summer for a buck, plus expenses (little stuff like liability insurance, repairs and maintenance.)

The new guy, Councilman Jim Gunning, advised people to come to the Study Sessions prior to the meeting. (Not to be confused with Executive Sessions where constituents are not welcome.) I think I'll take that advice.