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Morrison [Change Location]

Blog Entry 5 of 15 Things, news, whatnot
I'm Karen Ward Gilbert, a (former) community journalist here at YourHub.com. In this blog, I may (have written) about current events, the latest happenings at YourHub.com or blather ranging from what I overheard on the bus to my new favorite chocolate bar.

Bad to the Bone, indeed, Mr. Thorogood


George Thorogood and the Destroyers -- of "Bad to the Bone," "Move It On Over," and "One Bourbon, One Scotch, One Beer" fame - have been around for 30 years.

Which means, unfortunately, I've been meant to suffer this aural groin-kick nearly my entire life. (It may or may not be kosher for women to use the term "groin-kick". Jury's out on this one.)

I probably first heard "Bad to the Bone" when it "took the world by storm" (according to the band's official Web site) in 1982. I hated this song then (at the impressionable age of 8) and I continue to hate it now. It's the worst of the above-mentioned trifecta.

The song's grating intro (you can hear it those seven notes now, can't you?) has trained me to automatically cringe because I know what's coming next: Unbearably stupid lyrics and unadulterated male bravado.

To wit:

"I broke a thousand hearts, before I met you
I'll break a thousand more baby, before I am through
I wanna be yours pretty baby, yours and yours alone
I'm here to tell ya honey, that I'm bad to the bone"

This, only after George manages to stutter:

"B-B-B-B-Bad to the bone
B-B-B-B-Bad
B-B-B-B-Bad..."

It's one thing if George's speech is impaired thanks to a couple bourbons (or scotches or beers) but it's clearly another if the line is just that: A (sad) Pick-up Line. No girl I know wants a piece of that.

Look, first he boasts about breaking all these hearts, then he tells some poor, witless woman he wants to be her one and only? What woman would want to date a man who (allegedly) is destroying the lives of thousands of chicks on the side? Clearly, this guy just doesn't get it.

And while I'm at it, what does it mean, exactly, to BE "bad to the bone"? "Bad" how? And so "bad" the badness runs deep, all the way to his very skeletal core? Is that as "bad" as bad gets? Furthermore are we to understand "bad"as "good"? (Just as some might argue "maybe" means "no"?)

George, you're losing me here.

While I realize the 18-35-year-old-women-seeking-lifelong-relationship demographic likely wasn't George's target audience -- the inexplicable overexposure of the band's horrific radio/commercial/movie-soundtrack-favorites reach every last den of humankind.

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Showing 1-5 of 5 comments

Nice!

I can't speak ill of Ol' Horseface and the Destroyers, but I did like this. Also I'm for a gender neutral use of "groin kick." Mostly because the alternative leads me to things that I'd probably get fired for posting.

I agree with Bill. I don't mind George Thorogood, but I will say this: The only songs he did that I like are blues covers, not songs he wrote. Also, I think your nephew is right. Bill, I'm going to have to raid your John Lee Hooker collection sometime.

One Bourbon, One Scotch, One Beer is actually a combination of two blues classics by John Lee Hooker, the above song and the song House Rent Blues. If you get the chance to listen to some Hooker, I highly recommend it. Boom, Boom is also very good. I suspect with out good 'ol George singing them, you may like them. Just a world-weary blues man telling a good story minus the cocky.

Here's a comment sent to me by my nephew (he lives in Seattle, so he's not registered): I guess you need to understand something---George Thorogood isn’t mainstream. The kind of gals like you see on Friends or Ally McBeal aren’t what he’s in to. I get a feeling George Thorogood is more King Of The Hill type. His audience is exactly the type of thing Jeff Foxworthy makes fun of. Actually, he and Gretchen Wilson would probably be a good couple. George is into chicks that ride Harleys, chew tobacky, own a Doberman, and know how to fight. (LOL) Oh---and chicks that keep their Christmas lights up all year long & know all the words to every Charlie Daniels song.
Showing 1-5 of 5 comments