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Blog Entry 221 of 567 What's Going On
Whats Going On
For some of my favorite blogs, check out Brendan's List.

Blog Url: http://denver.yourhub.com/~WhatsGoingOn

HubCap: Pickin' burgers

Contributed by: Brendan Leonard/YourHub.com   on 1/2/2007

About 15 miles from Salem, Ore., there's a little town called Sublimity, and in that little town, there's a little bar called The Wooden Nickel. In that little bar called The Wooden Nickel, there's a giant burger called the Rhino Burger. In that burger is two-thirds of a pound of ground beef, some cheese, some sort of sauce and tomatoes and lettuce. It's a lot to eat.

Of course, if you're a complete idiot, there's also the Double Rhino: 1 1/3 pounds of beef, or basically double the same sandwich. With fries, $8.69.

My friend Drew, who lives in Salem and works in Stayton, suggested we try the Double Rhino, with fries. Like in the"There's no way you can eat it,with fries," sort of way.

Now, we've all heard about restaurants that serve "The Big 96er," or pancakes that cover your whole plate and if you eat three of them your meal is free, or burgers they'll name after you if you can eat the whole thing. The Double Rhino is exactly that type of thing, except no one cares if you CAN eat the whole thing.

When we ordered three Double Rhino Burgers with fries, the waitress just kind of looked at us like we were college freshmen proud to be doing their very first shot of Jagermeister.

When our food was delivered, I immediately tore into the Double Rhino. At the first bite, I realized it was one of the best, if not the best, burger I'd ever eaten. Regrettably, I had to eat it fast, or my stomach would realize just how much food I was going to shovel in, and try to defend itself.

Drew had previously been able to eat the whole thing, but not the fries. Nick was taking it easy, acting like he ate 1 1/3 pound burgers every other day for lunch. He was tasting the fries, sipping lemonade, obviously underestimating the importance of speed eating.

I soldiered on, finishing the sandwich and feeling like I had just put a meat-and-bread football in my stomach. The fries went down slowly, but surely. I was glad I hadn't tried to eat them first -- starch expands in your stomach. With 20 or so fries left, Nick wadded up his napkin and threw it in his burger basket. He was finished.

"What the $#%@are you doing?" I asked.

"You gotta know your limits," he said. Pathetic. Drew, too, had given up. I stuffed the last 15 fries in, deliberately chewing each one until I reached a fullness no Thanksgiving dinner could provide. That was the most food I have ever eaten, in volume and flavor.

I am now a vegetarian, but can tell you if you die without eating a Rhino Burger, you've lived an unfinished life.

That's my burger story, which I decided to type up in honor of the slew burger-related postings I've noticed lately. What's your burger story?

Ryan Hatch, of Thornton, loves fast food,but hates the way he feels about himself after he eats it. All of it.

Harrison Hiebert, a fourth-grader from Castle Rock, recently was rewarded by Red Robin for his gourmet burger recipe, which he hasn't shared with us yet.

Our own Joey Kirchmer is on the hunt for the best burger in all of Douglas County. He's only had two so far, so if you know one, tell him about it.

YourHub.com Managing Editor Fairlight Baer wants you to join her quest to get an In-N-Out Burger in Denver.
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Showing 1-2 of 2 comments
Submitted By: Ann Himel
posted on 1/5/2007 @ 12:18:04 PM
(Not Rated)
I LOVE In-N-Out Burgers. They aren't good; that's not why I love them. They are a bit of memory and nostalgia. Taste-wise, they're not far from the White Castle Sliders, but every time we go west, we stop at In-N-Out. Several times. What is it about road trips that makes us eat bad food? Carls came to Denver - I don't see why In-N-Out can't.
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Submitted By: William Boucher
posted on 1/3/2007 @ 1:13:12 AM
Rated Blog Entry
It's all good, B. Even though your an herbivore, you are probably still digesting the Double Rhino. Tell Fairlight I had an In-N-Out booger last week when I was shoveling, but it probably wasn't what she had in mind.
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